There are going to be plenty of times in your caregiving journey that you want to help your senior more, but she’s not interested. There are some things you can do about that until she comes around.
You might be tempted to just fight it out with your elderly family member. That might have worked with situations in the past, but it’s not a great idea right now. Express how you’re feeling calmly and firmly, but don’t rise to the bait if your senior wants to argue. Instead, it’s much better to come back to the conversation later when you’re both feeling calmer.
Get on the Same Page about Goals.
If you don’t already know what your senior’s goals are, you need to get on the same page fast. She may want to age in place for as long as she can. She may want to ensure that she has family and friends around when she needs them and she may want absolute control over the decisions that impact her life directly. Your own goals for her might involve making sure she has the best quality of life possible and that she’s safe. Those goals can mesh, but you have to work together.
Assess What You Need.
Once you’re more aware of what your senior needs and wants, you have to factor in your own needs. You may need more time for yourself or you may have health issues of your own to manage. You may also simply need help managing the day-to-day tasks of being a caregiver. No matter what your needs are, look at how you can start to meet those needs.
Err on the Side of Safety.
If you’ve been holding out on helping your senior more or on hiring home care providers for her, you may not know when it’s time to reverse that decision. The best answer for that is to err on the side of safety. If you’re noticing situations in which your elderly family member is not as safe as she could be, that could be your indication that it’s time to make your move.
Some aging adults will come around eventually. But there may come a time when you need extra help regardless and you bring in home care providers even if your senior’s views haven’t shifted. Make it clear that you’re the one in need of help and avoid giving up.